Oh Gee Rank Me

I have been watching so much old H!P stuff recently I decided to revisit the days of rankings. Using https://ahelloprojectfan.github.io/sorter/index.htmof l I ranked the OG of Momusu, C-ute, Berryz and S/mileage. I chose Berryz simply because Chinami. Anyway the result?

Well when you get below 25 it is mostly ‘I don’t care’ territory but it is interesting how the top stays mostly stable but there are still people for whom respect just grows as time goes by.

Ai-chan – Fashionable? Hmm…

Choosing between Ai-chan and Nacky is like choosing which eye you would like poking out with a stick, except more pleasurable as there is no pain and you are just choosing between two beautiful human beings. So not much like having your eye poked out. Scratch that. Choosing between Koharu and Aika is more like the stick come to think of it although with Koharu it’s a stick to the eye while a piercing car alarm goes ArRggHarwaaAWAAAhARGGHHH in your ear. I suppose though the decision I made is based on the tiniest of margins. I feel I know Ai-chan just slightly more. Her heart is as pure as her clothes style is awful. Aww. I say the nicest things…

The top two had long careers with H!P and continue to work to this day although Nacky is now learning English (probably in New Zealand, the luckiest country in the world. They already had Chinami. How much good fortune do they want?) Junjun however only had 4 years and then pretty much disappeared. I hoped the 20th anniversary might have brought some panda power but no. Even so she has always been someone who made me laugh. She could hold her own with the best of them. She was also very good looking. The platinum era is where I came onboard so the feels are so strong for the members around then.

I always liked Konno (even naming a pet rabbit after her many years ago). She was a unique entertainer. The very definition of ‘my pace’. She seemed thoughtful, intelligent and in outer space in equal measures. She had a good sense of humour too. Plus just like the other 5th gen members in my top 6 she seems super nice.

Maimi is the super idol. Engineered in a laboratory to be both stunningly attractive and with a personality that anyone should like. Cool and beautiful and friendly. Easy going and athletic. All kinds of perfect.

Risa has risen a lot over the years. The fact three of the 5th gen are in my top six says a lot about how much that’s my generation. Risa is just…I mean…she’s kind of…lovely? I mentioned it before but her performance of Manatsu no Kousen in the Morning Musume Concert Tour 2008 Haru ~Single Daizenshuu!!~ live tour is my favourite live performance of all. It’s about as feelgood as you will ever get. I really respect her so much. I feel she was overlooked a little somehow. It could be equally applied to platinum era Momusu as a whole that the awesomeness wasn’t appreciated enough at the time by enough people. I totally adore her and that era.

Next is another happy soul. Chinami is one of those people who brings light to a room as soon as she enters. Such a bright aura. I mean she was in Berryz yet I like her this much. I wish she’d been in C-ute. Her and Maimi go together so well.

Quitty didn’t have all that long in H!P but she was fantastic while she was there. From Cinderella Complex onwards she shone. I guess it just wasn’t to be. Even so a light that burns super bright lives on in the memory and a voice that squeeked super loud…wait I’m being unintentionally rude again aren’t I?

Iida Kaori had some elegance that stood out amongst the brats that made up half the group when she was there. She had a good voice too. It felt like she belonged in a different world by the time she left. First gen to fourth gen is quite a leap and then 5th and 6th gen really tips the scales in favour of youthful cuteness and at times stupidity (although that was mostly the W duo). Even so Iida stuck around to see so many members arrive (and often leave) and she felt like a good leader. I can’t think of anyone with a similar personality in the history of the group.

Sayu is ahead of Rika. I’m not so sure that’s right but they kind of make an interesting pair. Ecomoni was a thing after all. As was that Angels photobook. I do think the Sayuminglandoll performances are very unique and enjoyable. She has somehow kept music as part of her career despite having a voice that’s barely more palatable than Koharu’s. Considering Koharu sounds like what I expect a wombat being strangled to sound like that’s quite impressive.

Ishikawa Rika was very much active in Biyuden and V-U-den when I discovered H!P. Both those groups seemed strangely similar. I’m glad Ongaku Gatas was a thing (I loved the Gatas Brilhantes football team too). Then there was Hangry&Angry a far more successful venture than Yossie’s follow-up one, Hangry and drunk. Can’t stop. Need to get to Burger King. Anyway Rika was in so many groups I loved. I think it took me a long time to realise though that she might actually have been kind of shy. I never quite knew how to take her personality. I think that always held me back a little. Super pretty though and I love her voice.

Eri, Airi and Reina come next and in a way complete the top tiers. I have deep respect for the likes of Nacchi, Gooch, The Godmother and Honey but they are still a gap away from those above. Eri had this awkward side that I like as I’m deeply awkward. If you can find anyone with a more likeable personality than Airi you are probably lying. If you find anyone who looks better in purple thigh-length boots than Reina you are definitely mistaken. Same if you find anyone who more resembles a cat that woke up one day to find they’d been turned into a human.

Such a rich history. I love that almost all the top 20 are still active. When I started getting into H!P there were no official Youtube accounts or Twitter accounts and Instagram didn’t even exist most probably (actually maybe even Twitter didn’t). Now it’s so easy to follow everyone and with the likes of Ai-chan that’s a godsend as otherwise I’d mostly see nothing. Although Ai, Reina and Miyabi are seemingly releasing an album in April. You can order it wit ha signed card from one of them via Limista. I can’t help but wish Niigaki was there instead of Miyabi though. A ‘Take Off Is Now’ reunion would be awesome. Even so it’s great to see something new coming.

There are so many talented and hardworking ex-members and then so many great current members. I feel blessed by all the good times I’ve had thanks to them. Long may it all continue.