Hello! Project Ranker 2018

Ranking the H!P members has become a yearly tradition. It’s a new year so a new ranking (which you can do yourself here). In this year of 2018, post-C-ute, Momochi, two thirds of Kobushi, Kudo and Aiai, just who are my loves in H!P and who are in Angerme? I will start at the bottom with one disclaimer: I don’t hate any idols. They all try their hardest to make their career a success and all deserve respect for that. Nevertheless just which member of Angerme is in last place?

48. Katsuta Rina

Congratulations! So many years in H!P already and who exactly are you?

47. Nakanishi Kana

And you can’t have Thingy without Whatserface.

46. Niinuma Kisora

No great reasoning here. She just doesn’t appeal to me.

45. Kanazawa Tomoko

Another who doesn’t appeal.

44. Sasaki Rikako

Sorry but her over the top flailing arms dancing and her equally over the top reactions grate with me.

43 and 42. Kawamura Ayano and Kasahara Momona

I genuinely have no clue who they are. Both look quite attractive to be fair though.

41 and 40. Turtle-chan and Tony Danza. I mean Yamagishi Riko and Kishimoto Yumeno

I’m liking Tsubaki more and more. i don’t dislike these members but they don’t particularly stand out either.

39. Uemura Akari

Another idol of the non-grabby attention variety. I find her sort of bland.

38. Sato Masaki

She has sort of grown on me to the extent she is not last. Maybe she’ll grow more into a respectful middle of the pack position or maybe she’ll graduate. At least she’s a lot calmer these days. She doesn’t give me the Kago Ai vibes anymore.

37. Makino Maria

Kind of the most boring Momusu member.

36. Danbara Ruru

Could be great. Time will tell. Being put in Juice=Juice doesn’t help me notice her though.

35. Akiyama Mao

Chairman Mao can’t command my undivided loyalty.

34. Mitsui Aika

Not as annoying now that she’s not active. Actually kind of sweet.

33. Yamaki Risa

Good at drawing but not that good at drawing my attention away from other idols.

32. Takagi Sayuki

Likes Reina. That’s good. Isn’t like Reina. That’s unfortunate.

31. Kamikokuryo Moe

Interesting looking in an uninteresting group.

30. Tanimoto Ami

An okay Tsubaki member.

29. Yanagawa Nanami

She’s sweet. Also saxy.

28. Ikuta Erina

Funny at times. Yet not super charming.

27. Ogata Risa

Pretty. I simply don’t have much of an angle on her yet.

26. Kaga Kaede

Interesting looking. Could be fierce. Could make Kudo look like a girl.

25. Inaba Manaka

She’s back but without a group. She’s not super interesting to me though anyway. She’s okay though.

24.Miyamoto Karin

Always a cute kitten.

23. Miyazaki Yuka

My J=J favourite. J=J just aren’t that high on my list of likes though.

22. Yokoyama Reina

Really pretty looking idol who I will get to know better in the coming year.

21. Wada Ayaka

Intelligent current leader of H!P who nevertheless gives off faint cat lady vibes.

20. Takeuchi Akari

A duck that’s related to Maimi. Competitive in a good way.

19. Ogata Haruna

Attractive Momusu member who nevertheless doesn’t capture the imagination too much. Likeable though.

18. Funaki Musubu

Weird but funny. A good mix.

17. Fukumura Mizuki

She loves Hello! Project and deserves love back.

16. Ono Mizuho

I can’t explain why but there’s something about her that makes me want to see more.

15. Murota Mizuki

Angerme’s most attractive member. The only one that really grabs my attention and perhaps it’s partly just looks. Having said that when you are in Angerme you need all the help you can get.

14. Wada Sakurako

Lowest of the Kobushi members but still top 15. Thoroughly likeable.

13. Hirose Ayaka

Second lowest of the Kobushi members but no shame in that. Kobushi are great both in terms of music and members. Their leader is beautiful and full of fun. Hopefully in 2018 she’ll get to spend less time apologising for the actions of fuckwitted members.

12. Nonaka Miki

It’s not just because she speaks English. It’s also because she’s slightly dorky. Anyway gotta like her.

11. Inoue Rei

Funny and charming. What’s not to like?

10. Morito Chisaki

Into the top ten and a slew of Momusu members appear. First up the adorable Chisaki. She’s so cute and sweet and adorable. It’s no wonder she’s popular.

9. Oda Sakura

Such a great performer. There’s a serious side to her yet a ready smile too. The Ai Takahashi vibes are still there as strong as ever but she is her own person. There’s a calm feeling to her that’s kind of beautiful.

8. Haga Akane

I saw a fan club birthday DVD and immediately she became my favourite twelfth gen member. She reminded me of Sayu somehow. This happy idol-like persona that demands your heart and damn it but she deserves it too. Let a little Akane into your heart for 2018!

7. Onoda Saori

She has the looks of a young Nacchi crossed with Mr Spock. She lights up every Tsubaki PV. She’s a star in the making.

6. Asakura Kiki

It was so close. Who is my favourite in Tsubaki. Such a tough decision. I’m looking forward to seeing a lot more of the group in 2018. Truth be told Saori and Kiki are far and away my favourites so it could have gone either way. Kiki’s otherworldly charm just edged it for me. She’s beautiful, unique and may be thinking whether she left the iron on or may be thinking about murdering you. It’s hard to tell. Who can resist such mysterious charm?

5. Ozeki Mai

Less active now but as unique and likeable as ever. Mai entered H!P with a presence that showed confidence beyond her years. She’s awesome.

4. Iikubo Haruna

Honey continues to charm. Beautiful, stylish and full of compliments and humour. Perfect idol.

3. Nomura Minami

So eye-catching on stage. When she’s performing her expressions light up the screen. In any other group she’d be the stand out member. Nomura Minami is the kind of idol that just grabs you and demands your attention. She deserves it too. A fantastic idol with looks and personality in spades.

2. Ishida Ayumi

Another idol who leaps off the screen (Jaws in 3D). An idol with such an energetic personality and such a wicked smile you can’t help but want to give her your soul and more importantly one of your legs to chew on. She is pretty much perfection quite frankly.

1. Hamaura Ayano

The Queen of Hello! Project. An idol I supported from her Kenshuusei days. It’s not often I notice the Sushi members so it’s an achievement in itself to grab my attention so early on. Hamachan is perfect to me. Funny, energetic, sometimes sensitive, sometimes serious and always beautiful. An idol who loves being an idol. An idol you can put all your support behind and know it’s not being wasted. Hamachan was born to idol. She’s a natural. She’s the deserving number one. God save the Queen of Hello! Project (from scandals). All cheer her! Hello! Project Hello! Project hooray!

Leave a comment