Hello! Project Kenshuusei Review

Yes it’s time to review the current H!P Sushi members. Since the Hello! Project Kenshuusei Happyoukai 2017 ~Haru no Koukai Jitsuryoku Shindan Test~ footage is up on Youtube there is no better time.

So the MC is of course Makoto and then on the judging panel are Maimi, Nacky and Yurina. So good to see H!P’s best member there. The most awe-inspiring and fashionable person H!P have ever had. MAKOTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

❤ Teach me your sartorial elegance Makoto-sensei. I want to learn!

Anyway onto the acts. First up was…

Ishiguri Kanami. Well she left no real impression. Not a very interesting voice or aura. Next!

Well next was Yamazaki Mei…

Her voice is not very developed but the choice of song fitted well. Chu chu chu summer party indeed. She does have that kind of air about her.

Third up was Shimakura Rika…

A pleasant and professional performance of a quite bland song. She uses her face well.

Fourth was Hibi Marina…

Her voice alternates between “quite nice” and “are you having a stroke?” Her dance is good though so she seems to have potential.

Onto fifth now. Kawabunga…I mean Kawamura Ayano…

Well she danced really well and is helped by being very attractive in her figure. Her voice was good too so she’s a strong one. She stood out in good ways.

Number 6 was Kudo Yume. Although she’s not a number. She’s a free Sushi…

Her performance was so bouncy I’m still not sure what she even looked like. Her voice was sort of deeper than her looks probably suggest. I have no idea whether I liked her or not though.

Seventh was Kitagawa Ryo with a great choice of song…

Her face is sort of like a younger and cuter Maasa. Her movements were a little stiff though. The overall impression was positive and her choice in music faultless.

Eighth was Matsunaga Riai…

Another good choice of song. Her voice is a little dull but she looks good and has appeal.

Eguchi Saya was ninth in the running order…

She was bouncy and cute and happy. I’d like to see more of her.

And I’d like to see more of Doi Rena too…

Her voice wasn’t that good but she has a nice feel to her. Consequently I’m now not allowed with 500 yards of her. Well really! I blame Nike. They were the ones that said “Just Doi It”.

Following Doi was Yamazaki Yuhane…

I don’t want to say anything negative about her because she might hear me. Her voice wasn’t strong but she seems cutely appealing.

Then came Inoue Hikari…

It was a confident and professional performance yet I was underwhelmed. Maybe that’s because I spent the whole time wondering who she looks like. It’s someone. She definitely looks like someone. I just…can’t…quite…think…who.

Thirteenth was Yonemura Kirara…

Daww. She’s tiny and looks about ten (although she’s 13). I hope her mummy gave her permission to be out with strangers. I have to say it’s hard not to like her at least a bit. She seems to have an energetic aura to her. Also she did a C-ute cover. There’s class!

Nishida Siori was up next…

A great song but kind of hard to do it solo. An energetic and likeable performance though.

Yamada Ichigo followed…

She didn’t leave much of an impression.

Maeda Kokoro takes us midway…

Sadly she also underwhelmed me.

Kodama Sakiko did a Buono song…

It was fun although her voice wasn’t great. She seemed energetic and happy though and that’s good idol material there.

Sato Hikari came next…

I’m terribly sorry. I can only presume my computer has been infected with some kind of virus.

Anyway I need to be careful what I say about her as she might hear…oh I’ve done that one. Well regardless she’s kind of cute. Her face makes her look like Mr Spock’s love child though and with those ears I’m wondering if she’s H!P’s first alien member.

Meanwhile Kanatsu Mizuki looks like she’s bringing back the 70’s…

Her outfit put me off.

Yoh no! It’s Momohime…

To be fair Mitsuihime gave a really confident performance and her dance movements were good. I really need some kind of trigger warning before she comes on screen though. The flashbacks!

Kawano Minori followed performing Oh My Wish!

My wish is that she’d not worn those earrings.

Number 22 was Takase Kurumi…

And if the boys and girls watching at home want their own idol outfit they can make one themselves. An old white bedsheet with a rip in it makes a perfect top, some tinfoil makes an ideal skirt and for an authentic looking hat a silver foil pie tray and some blue cardboard will make all the children look like a loon…sorry an idol.

Kurumi is really appealing though. She stood out a lot in good ways last year and despite not really liking the song this year she left a positive impression again. Not bad going considering her Thunderbirds pie foil hat.

Horie Kiduki took the 23rd spot…

And left no impression.

The impression Ono Kotomi left was that she’d just had a nice and very un-idol-like night…

The next morning when you wake up you should put on your own shirt!

Hashisako Rin meanwhile performed Massara Blue Jeans with an inspired opening…

She won the personality award but to be honest other than the sunglasses I found the whole thing forgettable. And coming from a C-ute fan that’s saying something.

Okamura Minami was not exactly forgettable in her flowery outfit…

Her voice would fit in perfectly in Angerme. Well if Angerme still had four members and were called S/mileage it would. I’m not sure what to make of her. Is she cute? Is she annoying? She kind of reminds me of Masaki so I’m edging towards the latter. But there is something in her performance that makes me want to see more before I make my mind up.

Not many left now but there just time for Nakayama Natsume to walk home from school and sing us a song as she does so…

Again I’m not sure if she’s cute or not but the performance was. Nakayama Loli certainly left a loli…I mean impression. And loli loli loli so I’d loli to loli loli loli in future. Mind you loli loli loli and loli loli but then aloli who loli? Sorry. Mind has melted. Loli.

Onto number 28 (of 31. we’re almost there) and in a break with tradition it’s time to welcome back an old Momusu member…

Fukuda Asuka! It’s been such a long time! What do you mean that’s Noguchi Kurumi? What do you mean she’s only 15? Lies! If that’s not a look and outfit from a first/second gen Momusu single then what is? Good choice of song though. The second person to cover it.

Taking the coveted number 29 spot (okay I’m just making shit up now) was Ota Haruka…

Your idol wants you!

…to stop laughing at her outfit please. It’s off-putting and she’s trying to sing. Sing badly. She’s kind of cute though.

The second-to-last spot was taken up by new fully-fledged H!P member Ichioka Reina…

Well I’ll be seeing more of her I guess. This performance made her seem like she’d fit in well in Angerme. If Angerme had a million members, shit songs and were kind of forgettable. Which is all true. It’s only one performance though. It’ll be interesting to see more of her. I look forward to getting a more fully rounded impression of her.

Finally number 31 was another now fully-fledged H!P member. Danbara Ruru…

I might be in the minority but other than the fact her name sounds like some kind of chant or vocal warm-up exercise I’ve never found her that interesting.

And so that’s it. 31 Kenshuusei performing. Now for some Morningtime awards. None of that giving someone a personality award just because two of the judges are C-ute members and she did a Maimai. Oh no. The Morningtime awards are as pure as Morningtime himself. Therefore if you are of a sensitive disposition when it comes to idols and want a blog that gives a trigger warning before anything that may offend, please please…go fuck yourself. What? After nearly ten years of this you should know by now what you are in for.

So first up the Morningtime Award for Fan Service (Outfit and Dance) goes to…

Kawabunga what legs though. I mean Kawamura Ayano.

The coveted Morningtime If There’s A Hell Down Below We’re All Gonna Go Loli Loli Loli award goes to…

Nakayama Natsume

The Morningtime Excuse Me Young Lady But Do Your Parents Know You Are Here award goes to…

Yonemura Kirara

And finally the special Gerry Anderson F.A.B. award can only go to…

Takase Kurumi. I think the puppeteer accidentally just dropped her right hand there.

I have to say that there are quiet a few worth keeping an eye on though. As well as those above, Doi Rena, Matsunaga Riai, Nishida Siori and Eguchi Saya are all worthy of seeing more of. Meanwhile Noguchi Kurumi is worthy of investigation by the science community as she has obviously travelled here from the late 1990’s. I’m guessing they are already involved with Momohime what with her being cloned from Mitsui and all.

I’d really love to see the full performances. There’s a lot of bright idols-in-training there. I’m guessing we will get to see a lot more of some and not so much of others. That’s the lottery that is H!P Kenshuusei.

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6 responses to “Hello! Project Kenshuusei Review

  1. My favorite perfomances were Kawabunga (legs and jellybuttons everywhere), Minihime, Queen Danbara and Makotonyan.

    The rest not bad.

    Like

    • There are some interesting sushi there at the moment. I liked a lot of the younger ones because it’s interesting to see just how they turn out in the end.

      Like

  2. From that angle, Inoue Hikaru kind of reminds me of Tonooka Erika from Idoling!!!… I can’t unsee it now.

    Now with the comparison of Okamura Minami to Masaki, I have to follow her, bwahaha (I love the troll members, haha.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hikaru sort of seems like she’s from another world compared to the others. I look at her snd imagine her singing enka songs in old people’s homes.

      Masaki is my Kryptonite. I have a super allergic reaction whenever I see her.

      Liked by 1 person

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