H!P News Round-Up

Yes it’s time for a picture-filled round-up of what’s been happening on Planet Hello! Project.

C-ute continue to be “cool” with Maimai appearing in this ad for lubrication gel…

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“Arousal. For those special Chisa moments”. Dirty!

Talking of Chisa being dirty she seems to like taking photos of sleeping members and putting love and heart over them…


Disgusting! If you or I did that it’d mean being arrested and forced to sign a register but when an idol does it it’s okay. Typical. One rule for idols who happen to know the members and another for complete strangers. Tut!

Don’t you just hate it when you wait ages for the lift to come and then when it does it’s full?

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Damn. I guess I’ll just have to wait until the next lif…oops I’ve accidentally tripped and fallen into the lift and now the doors are shutting. What a shame.

New Hello! Project horror film announced…

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Not sure if it’s called Tokyo Chainsaw Momusucre or Invasion of the Idol Snatchers. Anyway I haven’t seen anything so disturbing since Ayaya quit the music scene.

If you think Chisato photographing sleeping C-ute members is a bit pervy just look what went on with the Berryz…

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“That big hole”? That’s no way to talk about Maasa. Anyway the filth!

Not to be outdone by C-ute and Berryz Momusu show that they too have members who like to get up close and personal…

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“We’ll just pull this up for you. Just slowly pull it up…nearly there…just a bit longer. It’s nearly all the way up…just a little…bit…more…”


“Go on Riho Suck all…that…cream…off…slowly. Open your mouth wider”. Did Sayumi get a job directing Momusu DVD magazines or something? It’s virtually softcore porn! I don’t approve!

I’m just glad that those young ‘uns in Juice=Juice haven’t been influenced by all this pervyness.

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Okay this is getting a bit much now. Idols are supposed to be wholesome . I mean what next? A member of Angerme eating something phallic?

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Right that’s it! I’ve had enough! The next pic will be a nice happy typical idol pic full of happy smiling girls against a colourful background. Something nobody could possibly find anything offensive in…


Uemura Akari!


Right. What we need to end on is good old-fashioned family entertainer. I’m posting a pic of Ronnie Corbett! It’s come to this. Posting pics of old comedians just to try and get things clean!


No wait. Sorry…




3 responses to “H!P News Round-Up

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